Your Sanctuary Asks You to Let Go

Photo Credit: Kourosh Qaffari on Pexels

When you build your Sanctuary, you aren’t just building a place for peace and self-empowerment. You are also creating a space void of all the experiences from your past that contributed to your suffering and exhaustion. We must learn to let go of all the beliefs and past hurts that keep us attracting more of the same.

It is about forgiveness, and a willingness to accept that, right or wrong, these experiences happened. The key is to know that the real gift is the lessons they brought us. We can frame those lessons in a negative light to continue to protect ourselves, or we can frame them in a way that frees us from the pattern they hold. Instead of analyzing in our mind why something happened, we can acknowledge that the lesson is where we can focus to allow the answer to come through the heart.

If we only remember the bad things, we live in a future created around those bad things. We begin to identify ourselves through those bad things and miss the growth. We see ourselves as survivors rather than courageous and capable, because that is what it took to get to the present moment. We see ourselves as victims rather than souls who chose to endure situations that would allow us to become strong and compassionate. When we break a pattern from our past - or overcome a tough situation - we aren’t escaping. We are making ever progressive choices that lead us away from those patterns. This perspective allows us to see we had agency the whole time, and found the courage to wield it. Whether we had help from outside ourselves or not. The simple act of choosing to accept that help is proof of our courage.

My whole life, I’ve only recalled the bad things that happened when I was a child. I have focused on those things thinking I was healing myself. What I’ve realized is that I was choosing to continue to carry something I thought defined me. I carried anger and resentment for those who treated me in ways that hurt me. I carried those emotions as a badge of honour for my strength. But really I refused to let them go because I identified my strength as something resulting from my suffering rather than an innate part of who I am. I identified as a victim of someone else’s behaviour, rather than a strong person who simply experienced the actions of another wounded person. I wasn’t powerless, I was simply unaware. I took on the situation as something that defined me and now I know it was something that presented a lesson meant to help me remember I was already defined - I already knew who I was. I just needed to learn how to communicate that to everyone else.

The world tells us we must be successful and defines success as ownership and material wealth. I got caught up in that game and found myself striving to not just accumulate, but also strive for status. I’ve come to learn that none of that truly defines success. What success means for me, is being able to show up in the world without apology for my perspective or my gifts. To share what I’ve learned and seek out wisdom from others. To live from the heart and see every person that crosses my path as a teacher. My most recent lesson is learning how to take life less seriously because creating should be fun. When love is present, life is fun. When love is present, miracles happen. When love is present, healing happens.

So as you build your Sanctuary, think about what you are bringing in and consider doing some cleaning. Let go of those thoughts and perspectives keeping you tied to the patterns that you want to change. Give yourself the gift of starting from a new place of empowerment.